Nonprofit Launches Healing Chickadee to Help Children Grieve

A Connecticut nonprofit organization, Soulful Sydney, Inc., is addressing the often-avoided topic of death by helping children navigate their grief. Founded by Terry Murphy, who experienced the loss of her brother at a young age, the initiative introduces a unique program known as the Healing Chickadee, aimed at fostering conversations about loss among children.

Murphy, now 65, remembers the profound impact of attending her brother’s funeral at the age of 10, a moment that left an indelible mark on her life. “I want people to know the power of the funeral director and that they are in a position to help families,” she emphasized. According to the Childhood Bereavement Estimation Model, approximately 1 in 11 children in Connecticut will experience the death of a parent or sibling by the age of 18, equating to around 59,000 children in the state.

In recognition of National Children’s Grief Awareness Day, Murphy has dedicated herself to supporting children who face similar tragedies. About a decade ago, she established Soulful Sydney, Inc., focusing on the mental and emotional health of children. The Healing Chickadee program was created to facilitate discussions about grief through a creative and engaging approach.

“The Healing Chickadees are a group of birds with words called the Tweethearts,” Murphy explained. Each Tweetheart bird is designed to spark meaningful conversations with children about grief. The program includes engaging resources such as videos, activities, and coloring sheets, alongside educational material about real birds. Murphy believes that nature serves as a comforting backdrop for discussions about loss, suggesting that children are often more willing to express their feelings while engaging in outdoor activities rather than sitting across from a therapist.

As Murphy transitions into semi-retirement from her career as a nuclear medicine technologist, she has committed more time to the Healing Chickadee initiative. The program has gained traction, and Murphy anticipates having the Healing Chickadee available in 30 funeral homes across Connecticut by the end of the year.

“Your funeral director is not someone to be afraid of. They are a resource and now they will have something special for the kids in the community,” she stated. Recently, Murphy received a grant from the Petit Family Foundation to distribute the Healing Chickadee materials to organizations such as Parents of Murdered Children and Survivors of Homicide. In just one week, they sent out 80 birds nationwide to support grieving families.

Murphy regularly donates to local grief support organizations, including The Cove Center for Grieving Children. For instance, she recently delivered 30 birds to the Survivors of Homicide group for distribution during a candlelight vigil. She has also sent boxes to Parents of Murdered Children in Ohio and raised funds to provide 60 boxes to a grief center for children affected by the devastating fires in Maui in 2023.

The Healing Chickadee boxes not only contain plush birds but also include letters aimed at trusted adults. These adults can guide children to the Healing Chickadee website, which features videos with music from Disney composer David Friedman. Songs like “It’s Not Bad To Be Sad” and “There Is Life” are part of the engaging content designed to help children process their emotions.

Murphy notes that many grief centers have expressed interest in the Healing Chickadee program, highlighting its unique approach. The tactile nature of the plush birds provides an innovative way to discuss grief. Murphy reflected on her own childhood experience, stating, “After my brother died, we didn’t talk about the grief. Families often avoid the topic because they fear upsetting one another.”

She emphasized that the Healing Chickadee program is non-profit, focusing solely on supporting children. Murphy has enlisted a group of volunteers, affectionately called the Soulful Grandma Brigade, to assist in packaging the birds with care. “It’s become a unity in community project. A lot of people enjoy the project,” she said.

Lissa Lovetere-Stone, president of Munson-Lovetere Funeral Homes, Inc., highlighted the efficacy of the Healing Chickadee as a tool for communication. “We are always interested in how we can help children. As adults, we want to bring ourselves to their level, and the Healing Chickadee works really well,” she noted. Lovetere-Stone has distributed several birds and has found them valuable for facilitating conversations around loss, even with older children who may not initially appear to be interested.

“Death and speaking to children about death is such a taboo subject,” Lovetere-Stone remarked. “Some parents want to shelter their kids from even knowing about death, so having someone interested in crossing this line and starting this conversation is a great idea.”

For more information about the Healing Chickadee program, visit their website at healingchickadee.com or reach out via email at [email protected].